I Just Don’t Even Know Where To Start
“I mean she’s really pretty and all man, but divorced with two kids? You could totally do better than that. You don’t need all that baggage in your life.”
He couldn’t see my face as I laid there, snuggled into him and suddenly fighting the urge to let my body shake with sobs. I didn’t want him to know, I didn’t want him to see me like that.
I laid there for what felt like an eternity, trying to figure out what to say, trying to figure out anything to say at all.
I don’t know if he eventually accepted the thought that I was sleeping or what, but ever so gently he whispered into my ear “You are so beautiful and I’m not just talking about your appearance. You’re safe now and whatever happened doesn’t matter, I’ll never hurt you.”
He said the words that I so desperately wanted to hear and yet what overtook me was a feeling I am actually ashamed of.
It’s not fair to him and I know it. He has done nothing wrong. He has done nothing but treat me right, nothing but make an effort to make me a priority in his life and yet, it scares the shit out of me.
Don’t trust anyone, ever, because the entire world is out to get you.
I just don’t even know where to start.